Friday, March 24, 2006

From the State that Brought you Dubya and Shrubya...

I give you this:

  • So, for a good time, are Texans supposed to go to the library?

  • Seriously, I have no words here.

    Other then to say "Cheers to California" - with the reputation for the most eco-concerned hippie types...and some of the dirtiest air.

    At least I know I can go down to one of our local watering holes, knock back a martini or two, and not worry about getting arrested while I'm AT the bar.

    What have you to say about this, oh great and hilarious Gwen?
  • Gwen? Paging Gwen...
  • Just for the record: I have been to Texas (Dallas/Ft. Worth airport...twice), and other then the predelicion for funny headwear, it looked pretty normal. I was thinking about this new thing, arresting people while they're in bars, and honestly it isn't the craziest idea that has ever come down the pike. To wit, the following are illegal/punishable by fine here in sunny, crazy California:
    • One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock. (Riverside)
    • San Francisco Law:
      Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash
      It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear.
      Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
    • Pacific Grove: It is illegal to molest butterflies. (Where S. is from, by the way)
    • Los Angeles: It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.
    • You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
      It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
      It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church. Breaking this law is punishable by a fine of $500 and/or six months in prison (for the dogs?)
      Zoot suits are prohibited.
    • It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale. (In which case, fire away, right?)
    Freaky Friday!


    the sightspeed guy said...

    "Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street."

    Half of Downtown would be empty if that law were enforced.

    Do butterfly molesters have to register with Pacific Grove authorities? Just asking, cuz...uh, I've got a friend who's one. Just checking. For him.

    Meepers said...

    No, I think they just post a picture of them in the spots where they nest. Kind of a "name n' shame" approach. So your "friend"...butterflies, huh?

    the sightspeed guy said...

    Ha, me & the wife were checking out the local pervs at the gov't website where sexual predators (not including butterfly molesters) have their name, address, and best of all, PHOTO posted. And guess what? They are all freakin' scary. Great way to spend a half hour after boozin'.

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