Monday, June 12, 2006

Now With fluoride

Back ... and with a better, pain-free smile! First off, let me say this: If any of you (especially Californians) are in need of major dental work (like root canals, crowns, etc), I've got the Hombre for you to see. We're both pretty dental-phobic, (a Bad Thing if you take good care of your teeth but are cursed by genetics to a lifetime of crumbling, breaking, cavity-prone choppers - ugh!) but we had very little pain. Even though we spent the better part of two days sitting with our mouths wide open and the unpleasant sound of 'brrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZ' reverberation through our skulls, we agree that it was still The Best Anniversary Ever. It came as a real surprise to us that we enjoyed our experience...and I swear, not all of our pleasure was due to the innovative combo of pain pills and "Wine Wednesday" over at The Brigantine.... not that I would know anything about that. A-hem. Here's a quick run-down of the week:

Tuesday: Got up at the crack (yes, Chiada, I mean four am...not seven) and drove to San Ysidro (just this side of the Tiajuana border) - The International Motor Inn is not somewhere we'd normally set foot in, but they offer a shuttle service, right to the front door of a number of cancer clinics, dentists and so forth. Karen lost 4 1/2 inches. Our dentist actually drove us to get an X-ray ($20, took thirty seconds, no annoying gag-type thing in my mouth), showed us around some of the better parts of TJ (movie theatres that serve sushi and drinks? Yes please!) took us to the pharmacy (yeah! Cheap drugs!) and dropped us off at the border. Talk about service with a smile - he grinned and said, "Ok, you come back tomorrow morning, I spend all day working on you, ok? Ok!" We had a lovely (soft, for easy chewing) Indian dinner in downtown San Diego's Gaslamp District and I discovered a new reason to live - Ben & Jerry's Cinnamon Oatmeal Cookie Dough. Mmmmmmmmm - Chocolate chunks, oatmeal, and the heaven that is cinnamon ice cream.

Wednesday: Woke up, had breakfast, went back to Mexico, took a Demerol (or it may have been some kind of goat tranquilizer...) and spent a fascinating morning embroidering tiny orchids on a black linen sundress while stooooooned. Now there's a sentence you don't see every day, huh? It's weird, I think, to wake up in one country and spend the afternoon in another, in a drug-fueled haze - well, outside of Europe*, any rate. Doppleganger became master (mistress?) of her domain.

*Really: Ask Scott about the time he went to sleep on a night train in Spain, woke up somewhere else, partied with a bunch of Basque seperatists who gave his buddy what they thought was a pill of cold medicine....well, you get the picture. The afternoon was rather less pleasant, but the fact that we probably spent less than ten percent of what we would have in the States eased the pain of the "hamberguesa" that my gums were temporarily turned into.

Real Quick: A HUGE shout-out and thank-you at this point to scott's' sister (and the power that is The Internet) for getting us a sweeeeet room at the Hilton for Thursday night. We were so over the grime, traffic and general fish-type odors of our room in San Ysidro, even after just one night. You see, we had a kitchen, which meant that the previous tenants got the brilliant notion of cooking up some rank seafood and apparently leaving it out for a couple of days. Ugh! In an effort to combat the intense miasma of stench, I burned incense for hours and sprayed about a gallon of Febreeze - which left us mouth-breathing through a sort of Eau de Unwashed Hippy funk. Wednesday night... Well, like I said, it was the innovative combo of pain pills and "Wine Wednesday" and the excellent clam chowder over at The Brigantine that made me into a scintillating conversationalist.

Thursday: Our one day set aside for pure fun started in the hot tub and pool of the Hilton - our room had an amazing view of the San Diego skyline and a private patio - it was hard to leave! I discovered that if I drag the amazing sinking man around the pool in my arms, I get a great workout and he gets... The feeling of rushing through the water as though he were swimming. We stumbled across the perfect combination of Northern/Southern California (rocky dramatic beaches, clear warm water) in La Jolla. The museum of contemporary art had a thought-provoking (read: not my thing) collection of modern art inspired by the border - in his ongoing mission to embarrass me at regular intervals, someone let loose with a thunderous poot in an empty room. Lovely. Speaking of things that were, indeed lovely- the La Jolla caves are well worth either the 100+ wooden steps or the kayak tour that you'll need to take to check them out. Shopping and dinner at Azul (spinach, date, goat cheese, walnut and chicken salad? Check. Two desserts, one of which was complimentary? Check. Brilliant views? Check.) and an evening with our friends at a beach house in Carlsbad finished the night.

Friday: Emily found out what she's having and Saturday Lynn hung out with Hello Kitty - Hi Lynn - We on the other hand, were with our friends*, discussing the whys and wherefores of The Question with them several...Million times by my count - Happily they are some of the very rare individuals who actually listen when I give them my answer. I remarked that if I could custom order the high levels of cute that run in their family and have a little clone delivered (UPS or Fed Ex would be fine) by mid-fall, I'd give The Answer ("No" or "I simply cannot procreate, because I have other things to do, my house is the size of a postage stamp and I just cannot stand to give my mother the satisfaction of rubbing my own imperfections in my face for the next twenty years") just a wee bit more consideration.

*Our friends: Jim-Bob, his niece Lindsey, son Desi and daughter-in-law, MaryAnne and their incredibly edible boys, Cole (20 months old, blond hair, gold skin, hazel eyes, huge grin, a budding athlete) and Hayden (3 months old, dark hair, enjoys sleeping, pooping and The Boobie, blue eyes, dark skin, Kewpie-doll nose) Paradoxically, Scott seems to actually enjoy entertaining the notion of The Question when surrounded by their pleasant company. He talks a great game of, "Oh yeah, we think about kids, sure, someday...". However, I know the facts: A) He is not now, and likely will never be up for anything like a pooey nappy or a two am feeding. B) Like everyone, he's only getting older, and that means: More back pain, less tolerance for sleep disturbance. C) I would have very little tolerance for people asking my kids, "Ohhh, are you out with your Grandpa?" D) He has even less of a clue of what we'd be getting into than I do.

Despite all that, we had a great time- The beach house we stayed at was actually ON the beach, we'd stocked up on adult-type drinks and the basics (cereal, veggies, chips n' salsa, PBJ for everyone) and we found a killer place to eat just down the street. The house itself sat down from the street and just over the rocks that edge the beaches in Carlsbad. Although decorated in an interesting melange of 60's and 70's items (glass balls, weird wallpaper, overly baroque faucets, funky linoleum and popcorn ceilings) it was large (four generous bedrooms, three bathrooms, huge dining/living area, deck, back patio and front yard of sand) and comfortable. We slept with the sound of the waves crashing in our ears and the windows open. Saturday it was actually sunny, so Desi went surfing and I had a nice workout against the big waves. The water was so warm I was in for the better part of an hour, which was great. I also had the following exchange with a boy who couldn't have been more than 16 or 17 as I got out of the water:

Boy: "Hi....ummm will you go out with me?" (Nothing beats the direct approach, huh?)
Me: (as Scott is handing me a wrap) "No, I'm sorry, I'm waaay too old for you...plu-"
Scott: "...-plus she's married. To me." (Lifts my left hand and waves it in Boys' general direction)
Boy: (hoping that persistence will somehow pay off?) "But you're perfect for me!" (more or less staring at areas that... it is rude to stare at)
Me: "No, I really am too old for you - I'm like a decade older than you are" (applying wrap muu-muu style)
Boy: "How old are you?" (more staring)
Me: "Old. Old and married. To him" (gesturing toward Scott, who gave a stiff, one-armed wave and a very glare-y smile)
Boy: "'re...perfect for me...Ok, bye."

While this was somewhat amusing, as I haven't been hit on by a teenager in at least ten years, I instantly remembered a) how ham-fisted the lads can be at that age b) that I didn't miss it one tiny bit c) why I was not ever a big fan of males aged 18-29.5 in the first place - the subtleties generally escape them. We finished up Saturday night with some excellent pizza, pasta, packed up, and hit the road. Aside from the bits where I screamed at Scott for not signaling/talking on a cell phone/almost killing us and wrecking the car, everything went well. We also went under an overpass with a broken water main that was gushing water out of the bottom of it - a sight to behold (and then drive as fast as possible away from), like an urban waterfall. All I could think of were the thousands of gallons of water pumping into the concrete, weakening it by the second. Fortunately, I have a much more wild imagination then is needed for everyday life, and we lived.

A few hours later, we pulled into the driveway and were greeted by frantic, "Wwooowrr? wwwooawWWWrrrr? MerrrrrrooowWWWWWWWW!!", lots of kneading and pitiful 'You Abandoned us!' looks, a nice cat-hork on my couch, thirty thousand emails, and our nineteen tadpoles and one fingernail-sized frog. Casa de Meepers is right back on track.


Chiada said...

I'm so glad you're back!! It was a looong week of no posts to read. I kept checking just in case you took your laptop, hehe. And I finally have the joy of a comment on my post!! LOL. Dude, I LOVE that Ben & Jerry's flavor - the oatmeal cinnamon. Sounds like you two had a blast, despite the dental work. No more kneeling in tears & pain at Scavenge after having touched an exposed nerve ending, right? I need to get E. down there. At least my teeth are relatively healthy. Sure, I need a "full mouth debridement"... whatever that is. But, considering that I only brush.. err, X amount of time(s) per day, rarely floss, and only have like 3 cavity fillings, I'm not complaining. Talk to ya soon!

Meepers said...

Ya - you guys should go - its 100% worth it. We're going back early next month (mid-week, like on a Tuesday or the traffic and craziness is INSANE) and hopefully finishing up - think about it if you want to come maybe. Seriously - we got a partial root canal/8 fillings (me) and a tooth pulled and about 8 fillings, including 5 that needed to be taken out bc they were amalgam (Scott) and it was less than $700.00. So. stinkin' cheap.

No fair - I've been a brush-aholic since I was a little kid

chiefbiscuit said...

Sounds like an incredibly anmazing time - the last thing I would've expected. Sounds like it would make a good film! (Including the weird, wee teenage boy). You could call it - 'What Were They On And Where Can I Get Some?' :)

the sightspeed guy said...

come on, don't tell me you weren't the least bit flattered by that young whippersnapper.

sounds like you guys had a great time! makes me miss my hometown - almost.

Meepers said...

Truly not flattered so much as astounded at his incredibly bad eyesight/lack of tact. Amused though, decidedly amused. Scott - not so much.

We had a GREAT time! You do seem more of a Nor Cal boy, though. (To me)