Friday, August 04, 2006

Going Ape

The other morning, I awoke at six in the morning, eyes-wide-open, no-sleeping-now awake. I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, and let my mind wander as it would. Naturally, it seized, hawk-like onto a phrase and stuck there. The phrase? "Going Dutch"

Why Dutch? Are the Dutch so liberal-minded that they split everything down the middle? I was thinking about this, and made up a list of what "Going ______" (a bunch of different countries) would be. Here goes:

Going Australian: Six pints of Victoria Bitters and a game of pool.
Going Belgian - A stack of waffles, a box of chocolate, and you.
Going Costa Rican - Walk through the jungle and two shots of guarro.
Going Egyptian - Visit your local mosque, sign an engagement contract.
Going Greek - Stuffed grape leaves, ouzo and both of your families.
Going Hawaiian - Hit the beach, do the huki-lau.
Going Italian - Bring your friends, eat some pasta. Or polenta. Or pesce.
Going Japanese - Everything done using advanced electronics.
Going Mexican - Listen to some mariachis, drink tequila.
Going Norweigan - Hike up a mountain, hike back down. Repeat.
Going Peruvian - Wear a cool hat, ride a llama.
Going Russian - Drink vodka. Drink more vodka. Dance. Drink vodka.
Going South African - Swim with sharks, drink wine.
Going Thai - Get a massage, eat a curry.


Chiada said...

And here's what they'd all say about us:

Going American: Eat hamburgers & fries. Drink cheap beer. Get fat. Watch TV.

Meepers said...

For a date? I should hope not all at once... but probably:

-Overeat. Overdrink. Overshare. Overlook things you should really be concerned about. Obsesss. Repeat.