Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Full Circle

(An unremarkable story for all but the key Players, but I will share it nonetheless.)

Me, Circa 1997:
I had graduated and was going to be leaving for England (England! My first journey abroad!) The soundtrack of that summer was probably a homemade mixed CD of U2's "Joshua Tree", something from Rage Against the Machine and Bob Marley, with a touch of Lenny Kravitz and Chic Corea. I was seventeen, working enough to save up for my trip and still enjoy the Summer of my Freefall into the Void of Now-What-Am-I-Going-To-Do. I was dating a guy who was the perfect combination of troubled musician (jazz drums), new/different guy and parental irritation, plus I appreciated his acidly funny humour and other charming attributes. The fact that we had very different ways of looking at most things was not at all a problem, rather an interesting aphrodisiac. We would continue the relationship for another few years, until it was well past its expiration date and in its dying throes, a bit cruel. I had no firm convictions about anything other than the fact that time was on my side. I also weighed about 115 pounds and was perpetually tan with natural highlights. Highlights that I now have to pay $65.00 for, and a tan that I have to baste myself in bronzer to get. Oh the irony.

S, circa approx 1997:

He was a charming man (yes, I am making a Smiths reference) of nine and twenty. Cultured but not snobby, a musician (guitar this time) and interested in lots of things- artists, other musicians and traveling. He'd lived in LA till he was about eight, than Monterey after his father passed away. In the process of moving down to Santa Barbara and leaving behind a whole cast of good friends and a string of girls, girl friends and girlfriends who had knew him for the good egg he was. Some of them he'd even traveled (see: Greece, France, England, Italy) with, to the great relief of their mothers (who knew he'd keep those bloody Euros off thier darling dears. No offense to bloody Euros.) I mean seriously, look:

So there we both were, both living in Santa Barbara, doing our mutual thing(s). Then one day there was a going-away picnic for ... someone, I'm quite embarassed to say that neither of us have any recollection of who that person is. If I knew, I'd definitely invite them over for tacos and beer. Possibly even build them a cake. The picnic was held at the grassy park that overlooks this beach:


I knew everyone there, except for S. Being the polite, well-bred girl that I (once) was, I trotted over to introduce myself, as my dear mother taught me. He was sitting with our friends (they are the couple to the far right of the second to last picture) J and L., eating and chatting about... who knows what. Earlier in the day, he'd been up in Monterey, gathering a few odds and ends together. He'd been friends with J and L, (and incidentally, everyone in that same picture except ME!) for years, so when J rang him up to tell him to come down, he "threw everything in my car and jammed down."

I sat down and said, "Hi... I'm Maya, and I'm going to England!" It was not, I repeat, NOT a pick-up line. That naturally started an entire conversation, because S had just gotten back from the land of Engle himself. This is the look he rocks on holiday: (Nowadays that goatee is more cinnamon sugar-y)

My mother circled around, trying to feed me - we'd had about eight years of this number already and I was heartily sick of it. She'd insist that I "never ate in front of boys", which was, sorry mom, a load of crap. What I didn't do was eat when I'd just eaten, or eat when she tried to force me to eat. Which was often, so... you see why I weighed about 115 pounds than, don't you?

After I got up, S. turned to J. and said, "Who's the girl?" and J's poetic words were
"Dude, don't even think about it. She's 17, has a boyfriend, and I work with her dad and he's got a really bad temper." All of which was true - but once we got all that resolved, the rest, as they say, was history. I kept trying to set him up with my older girlfriends, and it never quite worked out. He was my go-to guy in case I went somewhere Sans Boyfriend - someone I knew I could have a good time with, and could be counted not to hit on me. A short three years later, we had the following conversation on our way to a concert.

M: "My dad is so silly - I told him that you're were not a threat, just an old friend when you came to get me - I was like, dad, its S, he's NOT A THREAT! Silly, huh?' - I'd recently dumped prior boyfriend, been in Costa Rica for a month and had been on a string of very casual dates as part of my new policy. My new policy being: Anything Can Happen - I'm Open to Possibilities! By the phrase, "a threat", I don't mean that my dad thought S was a physical threat to my well-being, but rather a Potential Suitor. Who he had not handpicked for me in some strange feudal tradition that I am not aware of. And was also closer in age to my mom (he didn't know that at the time) than me.

S: (Looking sideways in disbelief and horror) "I am A THREAT! I WANT TO BE A THREAT! Consider me officially A THREAT!"

M: (Shocked) "Ok...you're a threat."

We started dating a few weeks later, on a Friday. Two Fridays later on March 31st 2000, he took me to another beach and asked me to be his wife. June 4th of that year found us doing this:

You'll never guess where - t that same beach and park. Funny how what goes around, comes around, isn't it?



the sightspeed guy said...

I remember that day! Beautiful. You two, not the day. Well, the day, too. Never mind. I was there, tho, and I witnessed this sacred event. Pity we had to leave early.

Anonymous said...

This was the raddest wedding, simply because your dad and my hubby (Erik) took a swim in the ocean less than an hour before the ceremony started, and were dressed & pressed in time to walk you down the aisle (in my "something-borrowed" veil) to end in front of an awesome podium made of driftwood, the base of which was wrapped in my hubby's rope, which he always kept in his truck for rock-climbing emergencies. The Freer, Erik, and I picked those yellow iceplant flowers and placed them at strategic spots along the bamboo circle and the bamboo arch (another awesome creation by aforementioned wedding attendees/members). Ahhh. What a day. The cake was so delish! Yours and mine were simpy the best. YAY!

Meepers said...

Dude - it all came together thanks to you guys!